Some thoughts on counting the Omer and my PBSC donation …
Thursday, the day I found out I might be a PBSC donor, was the 29th day of the Omer, Hesed of Hod, Lovingkindness in Humility:
… Hod or humility is modesty—it is acknowledgment (from the root of the Hebrew word ‘hoda’ah’). It is saying “thank you” to G-d. It is clearly recognizing your qualities and strengths and acknowledging that they are not your own; they were given to you by G-d for a higher purpose than just satisfying your own needs. Humility is modesty; it is recognizing how small you are which allows you to realize how large you can become. And that makes humility so formidable….
… Does my humility cause me to be more loving and giving? More expansive? Or does it inhibit and constrain me?
— from meaningfullife.com
In other words (I think), if I do end up being a donor, I need to thank God for the ability to give but also remember to take credit for my own actions: joining the registry, saying yes, I’ll do it. If I don’t recognize myself, as well, I will be diminishing this gift.
(There are way too many lessons to learn! Sometimes it seems dangerous to even blink while in the vicinity of a holy book for fear of missing the one word that might change your life.)